#18

Matza Ball Breaker

“She’s the reason they call it the bread of affliction.”

Hometown: Midwest Pride!

Derby Position: Blocker/Jammer

How did you get into derby? Extreme sports were sweeping the nation. Mountain Dew sales were at an all time high. I too was enchanted by the sweet whispers of extreme sports. From the ashes of derby leagues past – I helped in the inception of The Chicago Outfit.

Tell us about your derby alter-ego: My alter-ego destroys foes using the highest form of combat – the guilt of 1,000 Jewish mothers.

Do you have a partner in crime? Who are they? The Final Frontier #321 – she’s the ultimate.

Say you had a power animal… what personifies you? Chicken (for matza ball soup – the greatest known weapon)

If you had a special attack move [out on the track], what would it be? The Flying V